


The Subtle Art of Furniture Choosing

by priscilacross



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: Dirty Talk, Drabble, Established Relationship, M/M, Teasing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-03-28
Packaged: 2019-04-14 00:46:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14124492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/priscilacross/pseuds/priscilacross
Summary: Jim needs a new desk for his studio. Oswald comes along to help him chose. Sometime in the future.





	The Subtle Art of Furniture Choosing

They were walking down the halls of the Gotham Ikea. Needless to say, the experience itself was terrifying. All Jim wanted was a new desk, nothing fancy, a simple desk for his simple studio. Oswald had insisted they have it custom made out of the finest oak wood, but Jim was having none of it. Still, he was growing tired of not knowing where the fuck he was in the building or where the desks were.

“Remember this was your idea,” Oswald gave his unhelpful insight. Jim grumbled back and Oswald snickered. “I’m  just  saying, we could ask someone for help finding the desks too.”

“We’re fine, Oswald,” Jim said, impatient, staring into the Ikea map, begging at it to reveal its secrets to him.

They keep walking side by side, for several minutes until Oswald came to a stop.

Oswald narrowed his eyes, “We _just_ passed this section. I remember those kitchen drawers.”

“What? No, I’m pretty sure we’re going in the right direction,” Jim said pointing at the map.

“No, James. We’ve been walking for- oh my god, we found them!” He pointed to the desks. “Alright, now pick one, and let's leave.”

“I wish it was that easy, baby. ” Now it was Oswald’s turn to grumble at Jim.

There were several desks, and Jim stopped to examine each one of them carefully. He was sure taking his damn precious time too. He reclines on them, sits on the chairs and thinks he’ll need a nicer chair to go along with his new desk too. He needed a sturdy desk. So he moved away from the flimsy ones.

Oswald slams his hands on the desk Jim is currently sitting in front of. “Come on, Jim. I’m ready to go home. That one looks nice, as did the last five. What’s taking so long?” Oswald complained.

Jim looks up at him on with a serious face, but his lips soon form a smirk. “I’m wondering which one of these you’d look best pinned aga-”

Jim didn’t get to finish as Oswald kicks him in the shin, knowing full well where the comment was heading. Apparently, he hadn’t kicked him hard enough as Jim was laughing.

“I’m serious Os, imagine…” Jim got up and circled the desk to stand in front of Oswald. He put his hands around Oswald’s waist as he pushed him so he seated on the desk. The smaller man shivered at the touch.  Suddenly  , it’s  just  the two of them at the store; they are unaware of the other patrons walking around. Jim leaned close to whisper into Oswald’s ear.

“After a long day of work... I push you against that desk,” Jim said, motioning with his head to the sturdiest desk so far. Jim’s hands started kneading at Oswald’s hips. “My papers fall to the ground, but I don’t care because I’m kissing your neck and touching you all over.” Jim’s voice was guttural, filled with lust as he continued.

“And then I turn you around." He pulled him from the desk, turned him around. He pressed him against the desk so Oswald’s chest was flush against the desktop. his thigh presses against Oswald’s ass. He pulled Oswald up again to whisper into his ear. “Then I’d eat you out and fuck you with my fingers, and after that, I’d pound into you, nice and hard,  just  how you like it.”

Oswald’s entire body burned with desire at Jim’s words, but he, unlike Jim, remembered where they were. “James Gordon, please step away from me,” Oswald says separating each word with a dramatic pause. “Get your damn desk, and let's go home. Now.”

Jim lets go of Oswald’s hips and steps away, hands up in surrender. Smirking at his lover, he asked, “Does that mean you like the plan?”

“Now.” Oswald repeats,  clearly  out of patience.

-

Jim  barely  had time to drop the pieces to his new desk before Oswald was pulling him to their kitchen. He pushed him against the counter. They started removing their clothes until they were in only their underwear. Oswald ran his hands over Jim’s chest, he leaned and kissed the juncture between his neck and shoulder. He bit down hard and Jim moaned.

“Oswald… _Os_ … I was not kidding…” he groaned out. “I want to fuck you against that desk.”

The gangster kept his ministrations, going lower on Jim’s chest. He reached a particularly sensitive spot. He took Jim's nipple in his mouth and sucked hard while his hands caressed Jim’s sides. Oswald's fingers toyed with Jim's waistband.

The detective moaned, “ _Fuck_ , Os… _hng_ …” his hands played with Oswald’s soft hair. He started to  gently  push his shoulders down, a clear sign to what he wanted.

Oswald chuckled at Jim's not so subtle actions but didn’t give in, instead he went back to kissing Jim’s neck.

“A little desperate, aren't we?” Oswald teased.

His hands moved down Jim's body, to his firm abs, down to his inner thigh and he caressed him over his briefs. Jim instinctively widened his open legs for his lover. His hips dug onto the counter as he tried to stop them from full on grinding up on Oswald's hand.

“Oswald, _please_ …” Jim moaned.

“Should I then wait for you to finish assembling your desk?” He asked as he ran his feather-like fingers between Jim's inner thighs.

Jim growled, “Don't you fucking dare, Cobblepot,” he warned.

“Oh?” He licked his bottom lip and smirked, “How much do you want this Jim?”

Jim groaned and grabbed Oswald by the hand that was currently fondling him. He pulled him towards the bedroom to show him exactly how much he wanted this.

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a post on tumblr about Ikea shenanigans. The url was broken when I went back to it though, apologies for that.  
> Talk to me about gobblepot on twitter @priscilakovu


End file.
